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Writer's pictureCarole Stizza

Where Are Your Missing Conversations?




Thanksgiving is a time to relax!

This is our young dog Powder setting the example.


We are in the months of crazy. There are work end-of-year celebrations, kid obligations, 4th quarter goals to finish, 2024 goals to start, and all the shopping, wrapping, gift-giving, cooking, and fun traditions we are bound to include. In all the hustle, we forget.

  • We forget to make sure our words are kind.

  • We forget to take the time to breathe, relax, smile, laugh, and exercise.

  • We forget that our kids, family, coworkers, and friends need us to offer a hand and make space.

  • We forget to have meaningful conversations.

  • We forget and blame the crazy pace of life.

And what happens when we look back? We regret the things we missed. Let’s stop the crazy. At home and at work.


Now is the time to create space for the Missing Conversations that make life richer. While there are many resources on this topic, including a great book by Bridgette Theurer & Heather O-Neill Jelks, called Missing Conversations - I was recently reminded of the beauty of intentional and meaningful conversations by an article in Experience Life, a magazine I subscribe to that covers topics that are Healthy, Happy, and For Real.


This article covered 5 skills for Authentic Communication. The Skills you will get to read about include:

1. Speak Kindly to Yourself - because if you don’t, you won’t speak kindly to others.

2. Greet Others Warmly - because greeting is at the heart of how we create relationships.

3. Cultivate Curiosity - Because you need to show genuine interest for any conversation to matter.

4. Practice, Practice, Practice - learning something new requires practice and any time you want to build the skills in having genuine conversations with others you need to practice.

5. Embrace Awkwardness - trying anything new feels awkward - so embrace awkward and just keep trying to have deeper conversations to learn more about those who are important to you.


Those 5 steps can feel like a lot as you juggle this season.


Here’s a shortcut:

As you tackle the holidays with friends you like, the family you are used to tolerating instead of getting to know again, and strangers who come as guests of others, is to simply start with mindful listening to what everyone shares as if you are getting to know them for the first time. You may find that you listen with more heart, more curiosity, and more kindness. No one gets up any morning hoping to be worse than the day before. If we all get up to be better today, give them a chance too.


My final wish as you embrace all the end-of-the-year fun - just like our puppy-

  • Breathe,

  • Enjoy the moments with those you care about,

  • Find joy,

  • and let yourself slow down even as the holidays bring chaos.

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